After the release of Vampire Alley, the sixth Sunshine Walkingstick novel, at the end of June, I took a month off.

That time off was completely unplanned. I had intended to jump right into outlining the first book of the newest series, but for whatever reason, one day passed and then another, and before I knew it, July had ended and I still hadn't started that outline.

I'm still puzzling over the whys. Mostly, I was just tired. Finishing both Vanessa and Sunny's separate series back to back took a lot out of me. Both had emotional endings, especially Sunny's. I hadn't anticipated how much writing either book would drain me.

And I hadn't anticipated how hard I would have to push to finish them.

So yes, I was tired on a lot of different levels, especially emotionally and creatively, and needed some time to recharge.

I also needed time to evaluate my career and decide which direction I'll be going in. I was sorely tempted to jump back into SciFi Romance written under my first pen name, Lucy Varna. After all, I love reading and writing that genre, and I have a ton of ideas for futuristic romances.

But was that really where I wanted to spend my time?

I'll admit to dithering quite a bit there, dithering for a whole month even.

In the end, the answer to that question turned out to be another question: At the end of my life, what books will I want to have written?

And another one still: Where will I be most satisfied having spent my time?

The answers to those were shockingly clear (not the kinds of books I've been writing), and thus do simple insights determine the path forward.

The honest truth is that while I enjoy Sunny and Nessa and all the stories and characters I've worked with in the past decade, too many of them were written with an eye to the market rather than an eye to what really appeals to me as a writer. Some were written just to please a small, core group of readers, but this amounts to the same thing. The motivations and reasons for writing many of the stories I published after 2015 - 2016 were coming from outside myself.

I've been wanting to write longer, more complex stories for years now, things that don't just satisfy my inner muse, but that also satisfy the way I want to create new stories. That means no more fluff (although hardly any of my readers would call what I've already published "fluff"). It means no more setting deadlines or sticking to one particular genre, or rushing to finish a story because readers are getting impatient.

(Not that my readers are pushy, but I do feel that artificial pressure to produce, as opposed to the natural, internal pressure to follow where the story leads.)

It means no more listening to gurus about what I "should" be writing, no more writing in markets that are "hot," no more following the crowd. It means doing what makes me happy in the way that's most satisfying and that plays to my natural strengths.

I'd like to take what Cal Newport calls a "slow productivity" path. Not writing slowly, but focusing more intensely on the things that are important to me as a writer, namely high quality stories and more meaningful connections with readers.

In other words, I'd like to step out of the rat race that indie publishing has become. Less busy work, more well-developed story worlds. Less social media time, more thoughtful interactions with readers.

To that end, I should warn readers that I don't plan on writing any further stories under this pen name. (Emphasis on "plan" because even now, as resolved as I am to chart a different course, I can't say "never.")

Instead, my time will be spent building a new pen name, Martina Anders, under which I will write Science Fiction and Fantasy, and possibly some darker stories and satire as well. These new stories will have a lower emphasis on romantic subplots, though I can't completely rule those out. They will be longer, more complex, and more deeply written, and they're not as unfamiliar as you may think.

In fact, you've already gotten small tastes of them in previous posts (here, for example), in my newsletter, and on social media. The first one I'm working on is a new Urban Fantasy series tentatively called the Order of the Thrice-Blooded Moon. The working title of the first book is Sentinels of the Divine, and the main characters are a warrior witch named Harlow, an ancient vampire named Samael, and a werewolf called Kyrnon.

Before I get sidetracked, I should explain why I'm not writing Sentinels under this pen name. The reason isn't exactly simple, but it can be summed up in one word: brand.

I've locked myself into a very tiny brand with books published under the Celia Roman pen name: first person narratives and short paranormal/fantasy mysteries with a strong romantic subplot. Most of the new stories will feature multiple narrators, a wider variety of genres, and longer, more complex, more deeply written (I hope) stories with smaller, if any, romantic subplots.

So it's a branding issue divided into genre, length, and type of story. I feel as if I've pigeonholed myself and have gotten a bit claustrophobic and constrained, creatively and otherwise. I'd like to break out of that self-created mold and work on very different projects, but all under one pen name rather than having to bounce around trying to maintain several pen names, as I've done in the past (and, thus, fractured my dwindling attention span). Again, this goes back to the slow productivity mindset; I want to focus my efforts, and the best way to do that is to start fresh with a clean slate.

Well, almost fresh and clean. One of the reasons I'm working on the Order series first is that I hope to bring at least some of my existing audience over to the new pen name. While I will be writing SciFi under that name, too, I don't anticipate the Order being my last Urban Fantasy. For one, I'd really like to delve into another series I've discussed previously, Gods & Monsters of Appalachia.

I'm still trying to figure out a writing schedule, blogging, social media, and so on, but I have faith that it will all come together nicely once I find my writing rhythm again.

And yes, my writing rhythm is completely gone, has been since late 2015, so that's one of the problems I'm hoping to solve over the next few months.

Part of all this navel gazing is from a recent age upgrade. I just turned 55, and with that shift came the realization that I may only have another decade or two to write. That limited time period really brought home the need to focus on the kinds of stories I want to produce. It takes months and sometimes years to get a story from idea to published product, after all. Realistically speaking, I may only ever be able to publish four to six full-length novels each year, if that (assuming I can stay out of burnout and find my writing happy place again), and I have way more than a full decade's worth of ideas waiting to be written.

So yes, it does come down to what I want to have written when I reach the end of my life.

I'm still offering Sunny, Nessa, etc. for sale and have no plans to ever pull those books off the market. I'll maintain the Celia Roman newsletter and social media stuff for a while longer, but once the first few books are released under the new pen name, I'll be devoting the majority of my time to it.

Thank you for being such devoted fans of Sunny, Nessa, Kaya, and all the other wonderful characters I've shared with you over the years. I hope you'll stick around for many more stories to come!